You’ve discovered something you’re passionate about and you tell your friends and family about your idea. You’re really excited to share your idea for a new venture and you know that everyone will be just as excited as you are.
But they’re not.
The people closest to you tell you that you’re nuts. It’s a crazy idea. They give you a million reasons why your idea is stupid and won’t work.
You walk away deflated. You tell yourself that they’re right and that you shouldn’t have ever considered it.
You stuff your idea, that passionate spark, back down inside you and go on with your less-than-passionate life.
But you know the spark won’t go away. If you don’t find a way to express it – your gift to the world – it will fester inside you and drive you crazy until you do something about it. If you don’t do anything, your body can develop aches, pains and illnesses as a way to send your mind the message that something is wrong (check out the book Mind Over Medicine by Lissa Rankin MD on that topic).
What’s the key to turning this situation around? Surround yourself with different people – people who have done what you want to do or people doing other amazing things who confidently support you with whatever your “crazy” idea is.
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” ~Jim Rohn
Where do you find people like this?
- Go to Meetup.com and enter your city and topic of interest.
There they are – the people you’ve been looking for. And if you don’t see a group that meets in your area on your topic, you can create a group and post it on the site for free. Yes, they will come.
If you’re a complete introvert, like I used to be up until 2008 when I lost my job in the worst job market ever and had to start networking to find a new job (read more about that HERE), there are plenty of other introverts out there waiting to connect with you. Push yourself out of your comfort zone. Get out there and meet people. Your life will never be the same. You can thank me for that bit of advice later.
- Attend a conference like the World Domination Summit.
Dee Williams, everyday super hero, at World Domination Summit
I just returned from my second WDS and was completely blown away by the coming together of about 3,000 of the most open-minded, supportive and amazing people you’ll ever experience. If you need inspiration, this is the place to be each July in Portland, Oregon. Click HERE to read about what happened this year.
Besides the amazing lineup of speakers they have, WDS leaves plenty of time and opportunity for magic to happen when amazing people get together and start talking. There are formal and informal meetup’s all over town and everyone is welcome.
- Enroll in a program like Connect With Anyone.
I’ve been a huge fan of Scott Dinsmore and his Live Your Legend site for years (definitely check it out – it’s free and you’ll never be the same after reading a few articles). He was one of my initial sources of inspiration and motivation. I’m so impressed by his leadership inspiring many thousands of people to follow their hearts, connect with supportive and empowering people and accomplish amazing things. He and his wife, Chelsea, are remarkable people (I’ve met them in person a couple times at their meetup’s).
Click HERE to find a Live Your Legend Meetup in your part of the world. And click HERE and ask to join the LYL Action and Accountability group on Facebook.
His Connect With Anyone course gives you tons of tools to help you to meet and connect with anyone, even the “big names” in your areas of interest (it’s easier than you think). The best part is that his team personally matches you with others in the course to form mastermind groups – where the real magic happens and your dreams come to life. CLICK HERE to watch a video from the course and read the FAQ’s.
What Will They Think?
Are you worried about what those nay-saying friends and family will think of you? Why?
Why does it matter what they think? Why not seek out the support of the amazing new group of people you’re now travelling with who are supporting you in your mission and ignore the opinions of anyone else?
If you succeed in your venture, the friends and family might be proud, jealous, happy or indifferent. If you don’t, they may say “told you so” or anything else. What does it matter? You can’t control what they think. It doesn’t matter.
The Art of Failing
“What if I fail?” So what!
To me, there is no such thing as failure. Your whole life is a big experiment. You try new things. If they bring you what you want, do more of that. If they don’t work out, learn from them and try something different.
If you take the time to notice, every experience teaches you a little more about yourself. Doing a little something to get yourself out of your comfort zone each week will change your life.
Everything great happens in baby steps. Take two steps, fall down, get up and take two more steps. That’s how we learn. That’s how we grow. That’s how we turn our dreams into our reality.
No Excuses
Now I’ve taken away some of your big excuses. If you’re still not taking action, what are you afraid of? What’s the worst thing that could happen?
I like to play the “worst case scenario” game when my monkey mind is firing on all cylinders to keep me from doing something that my heart tells me to do. Read about that HERE.
Whenever I play the worst case scenario game, I realize that I’ve already lived the worst things that could happen. I remind myself that, if it doesn’t kill me, it’s not that bad.
Your Future Is Up To You
Your life won’t change until you take action and change it. Take imperfect action. Don’t wait for the stars to align before doing anything.
Do something – anything – today.
Don’t wait for someone to give you permission. No one is holding you back but you.
Your “impossible” dreams are possible. With a little searching online, you can probably find someone already doing what you dream of. Find those people and reach out to them. You’ll be surprised how willingly they’ll share their knowledge and experiences with you.
All you have to do is ask.
What’s the worst that could happen?
And what will your life be like if you don’t?
What’s your next step?
Create the life you want: Combine the law of attraction with mindfulness
The law of attraction suggests that our positive or negative thoughts bring about positive or negative experiences. My latest book, The Mindful Guide to Law of Attraction, pairs that belief with the powerful practices of mindfulness. Through intentional breathing, writing, and engaging, you’ll hone a method for manifesting health, wealth, and love―the elements of happiness.
Let the law of attraction work for you by adopting its basic steps of identifying and visualizing the things you desire. Then use 45 practical meditation techniques included in the book to achieve awareness. By concentrating your positive energy on obtaining your wants, you’ll give yourself permission to receive them.
To your happiness! ~Paige
You can find this book at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Million, and Indigo.
The Mindful Living Guide
Hi, a very motivating post. Surrounding ourselves with people changes our attitude towards life, situations may not always be good, but having a positive perception in life will lead us to reaching what we thought of as impossible. Thanks for sharing. Great Post !
This was a helpful reminder that failure should be embraced. I completely agree that meetup is a valuable tool to meet people who are like minded. I will save this article as a reminder to myself that when I feel like quitting that I shouldn’t and that I shouldn’t be afraid of trying new things. I recently read an article from Forbes where the main message was basically, in the long run no one cares if you fail.
Thanks Sebastian! I agree with the Forbes article. Most people are too caught up in their own worlds to care much about everyone around them. It’s human nature.
I think the word “failure” should be stricken from the English language. There are so many more positive substitutions. I like “experiment.” Experimenting with new things opens the door to more possibilities. Why shut out possibilities?
I like that attitude. Let’s get rid of it : D. As that well known quote by Einstein goes, “I didn’t fail 10000 ways, I just found 10,000 ways that didn’t work.”
Great article! I feel so lucky to have found my husband. He supports me with any new life experiment that I try. He keeps me positive and never lets me make excuses. I sincerely hope that everyone is able to surround themselves with someone like that.
Sounds like you’ve found a true winner Cathy! We tend to attract what we put out to the world.
Hi Paige,
Your post has come out of the heavens for me.
that’s because I’m in the middle of doing something almost
similar to what you’re saying.
I’m wanting to move ahead on a project but wondering
about the right way to do it.
Then i guessed just starting off was enough.
And here you are; telling us to take “imperfect action”.Love that one.
It validates me and my belief so much.
Thanks
Mona
So glad to help Mona! Nothing is ever perfect. Any motion is better than none. Once you get the ball rolling in any direction, it will tend to stay in motion, moving closer to what’s in your heart. Feeling those little “win’s” keeps you moving with less doubting. Keep it up!
Paige,
My life has been very busy this year so I haven’t been to your page in so long and now I can see I’ve been missing out!
I love this post. It makes me think of a book I read this year call the Blue Zones. One of the keys to living longer, according to this book, is being part of the “right tribe”. You reminded me of this when you wrote about “What will they think?” If you’re hanging with the right tribe, they will be supportive of anything you do! You’ve also reminded me of Scott Dinsmore and his Live Your Legend program. I will finally go and check that out. You ‘re last advice of “take imperfect action” is also just what I needed today as I’m finally working on my book again.
Thanks for the inspiration!!
Betsy,
I have to say the same about your site. I LOVED your latest post and how you turned things around with mindfulness.
I’ll have to check out Blue Zones. I’ve read in many books how close connections with others play a huge factor in longevity.
“Take imperfect action” was a theme at this year’s WDS. Sometimes it doesn’t really matter what the action is because one small action leads to another and the ball is rolling before you know it. So glad to hear that you’re working on another book!
All the best to you Betsy!
Very inspiring Paige! And thank you for the ongoing reminders especially the one to find my own people. Why waste any time with people who don’t get or appreciate what you or I are doing! The people we are looking for are out there…we just have to be brave and relentless to find them. ~Kathy
Your community, your people, your tribe – however you define them – they’re waiting to embrace you. I used to think I was weird, different, the “only one” like me until I started reading about other people and going to different places to meet different people that were just like me.
I totally agree with you Kathy – don’t waste your time with people who don’t understand you. Don’t waste your time trying to convince them. Use your energy to find the people who will support you. Yes, you do have to be brave and relentless to find them. They’re not going to jump out from behind a rock. You have to go out and find them.
Thanks so much for the great comment!