This is a guest post from Tom Casano of Life Coach Spotter.
I believe that we can do anything that we can dream.
The power of imagination has created skyscrapers, smart phones and entire symphonies, to name a few. When we close our eyes and imagine what our ideal life would look like, we might see a picture or get a feeling or have a sense of what we would LOVE to have in our lives.
Many of the things that we think we want are just delusions of our egoistic mind. We don’t need those things to be happy. We don’t need them to feel great in the present moment.
Creating our own reality from the fertile fields of our imagination is a hugely untapped resource for most human beings.
So Why Don’t We Act On What We Dream About?
We get in our own way.
There’s not one “I” but two. There’s the ego: the chaotic mass of thoughts that directs our attention and behavior in a thousand different directions, the so-called “monkey mind.” And there’s the “real self,” the observer, the experiencer, the awareness being the thoughts.
So when I say that we “get in our own way,” it’s really that the ego gets in the way of the real self.
What Do We Really Want?
We think we want what our monkey mind tells us will make us happy. ”If I were rich, then I’d be happy.” ”If I had ‘x’, then I’d be happy.”
You may have had the experience where you wanted something for so long and after finally getting it, you weren’t fulfilled or happy. You actually felt more empty than before. How is that even possible?
You woke up from the delusion that this thing you’ve now attained would make you feel complete or happy. You suddenly realized how untrue that was.
The Cause of Being Stuck
If we want something meaningful in our lives, be it a career, relationship or anything, it’s totally valid to want it.
But what stops us from having it? Why don’t our day dreams quickly become our realities?
The monkey mind gets in our way. When we want to achieve a certain goal or an outcome, our monkey mind dreams up reasons why we can’t have it.
Excuses are always easy to spot in other people but not so easy to see in ourselves. Our minds play tricks on us.
I’ve noticed that the most successful people hold themselves accountable and don’t let excuses stop them. I love Oprah as a role model because there were many excuses she could have entertained for years. But she didn’t.
She held herself accountable. She didn’t believe the excuses.
This is where we may need a hand to achieve our big goals in life.
Why Journaling Helps
I’m a big fan of journaling.
It’s a safe space to get those monkey-mind thoughts down on paper. Somehow, the act of expressing what we’re thinking by writing our thoughts down dramatically increases our awareness of those sneaky thoughts spinning around in our head without our permission or awareness. The moment we start writing things down or talking about them with someone else, we start to hear what we’re saying to ourselves.
We hear our excuses.
Take a moment right now and choose one thing that you’ve wanted in your life for the last few years. Ask yourself why you don’t have it. Write down whatever comes to mind. Find anything interesting or suspicious?
Where we are (or aren’t) in our lives now is not so much because of these reasons. It’s because we’re submitting to these reasons/ excuses.
Our journals are mirrors into our real selves. They allow us to see our thoughts in the flesh. While our thoughts are in our minds, they’re cloaked because we’re identified with them. When they’re out in the open, they become severely weakened and sometimes instantly fall apart.
The Best Mirror to Achieve Your Dreams
Often it will take more than several journal entries to keep progressing towards our goals. Therapists can mirror and reflect back our own thinking. They allow us to see our thoughts in a totally different way. With this reflection we can laugh about what seemed so limiting because it seems so ridiculous.
Life coaches can do the same. The difference is that a therapist focuses on the past, and a life coach focuses on the future.
Let’s say that you want to start a new career. You’ve been believing your subconscious thoughts that say any of the following:
“I’m not qualified.”
“I can’t afford to go back to school.”
“It’s impossible to get that job.”
“I don’t know how to do that.”
Without the awareness that you’re not only thinking these thoughts but actually clutching them, holding them to be completely true, you won’t be starting your new career. Becoming aware of these thoughts that you’re holding is essential to achieving your goal.
Yet because you don’t hear them — they’re cloaked in the background of your mind — you don’t see the prison that you’re living in. Writing in your journal can only take you so far. Your limited perspective restricts the perceived steps available to take in the direction of your dreams. Having a life coach, however, could help you gain the awareness that you need to achieve your goal.
A life coach is like the big brother or sister who you’re very close with. They’re like a personal guide, who gives you superhuman tools to get out of your own way.
You don’t even realize the degree of self-sabotage and distorted thinking that’s holding you back. Having a life coach reflect back to you what you’re saying gives you a fresh, new perspective. He or she is not going to let you keep believing your excuses or limiting beliefs that have kept you stuck.
So Get Unstuck
A beautiful way to break free of the bonds of your over-thinking mind is to work with an extraordinary life coach who can shine a light on your unconscious thinking in a loving way.
You get the tools you need to hold yourself accountable, to take on the responsibility of achieving your own dreams. You gain clarity and mindfulness of the monkey mind that’s holding you back. You get to have fun in the process too!
The best part? You get to live your dreams.
Do you even know…
What’s holding you back?
Tom Casano is the founder of Life Coach Spotter. He’s passionate about personal development and helping other people to achieve their dreams. Find out more about how life coaching can help you live an amazing life at Life Coach Spotter.
|In the United States, Thursday, November 28 is Thanksgiving Day. I think it’s pretty silly to reserve giving thanks to one day in a string of 364 other days. Check out a sampling of some of my daily gratitude lists here: What’s On Your Gratitude List Today?|
|I want to say a great, big THANKS!! to you for being a reader and member of our community. Next month marks the third anniversary of Simple Mindfulness and I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you. You’re awesome!!|
|As another way to express my thanks to you, I’m offering the Mindful Body program for 50% off until Monday, December 2, 2013 at midnight. Just use the discount code THANKS when checking out.|
|The program includes many ideas that you can use through the holidays and beyond to avoid gaining extra weight while keeping your energy and spirits high. It’s also a great gift to share with the special people in your life. Click here to learn more and take advantage of the discount: Mindful Body program|