This is a story about us being persuaded to spend money we don’t have, on things we don’t need, to create impressions that won’t last, on people we don’t care about. – Tim Jackson’s TED talk: Economic reality check
The messages we’re bombarded with from government, media and many other sources would have us believe that we need to be good consumers who want and buy ever more stuff to keep the machine churning. Government officials love to feed us the line that increased spending supports jobs. It’s all a bunch of BS.
As a society we’re spending at record levels and jobs and general economic stability are at some of their lowest points in history. We’re one of the unhappiest lots in history.
It’s high time we stopped buying into the messages of fear that are constantly fed to us in order to control us and keep us a scared flock of sheep.
Throughout the year, and especially during this holiday season, I challenge you to be more mindful of your consumption. Consumption of food, gifts, time, money and energy.
Before over-indulging at the next holiday party or dinner, think about how hungry you are. Think about how you’ll feel the next day after consuming what you’re about to put in your mouth.
Before spending your life energy (i.e. money) on a gift, think about why you’re spending it. Are you buying a heart-felt gift for a special person to convey how you really feel about them? Or are you buying out of guilt? Or to prove your worth? Or to out-do the recipient? Or to do what others expect of you? Or to make others happy?
Before accepting yet another invitation to a party or event, consider if that’s the best use of your time. Will you connect with people you truly want to be around? Or will you attend to be accepted by a group that doesn’t really support your goals or values? Would the time be better spent with close friends or family, or alone, nurturing yourself?
How do you feel about your responses? There’s no right or wrong, good or bad response. Just notice.
Some areas where I’ve been more mindful are:
- My investment of time and energy in preparing large holiday meals for my family. I love making delicious meals that my family enjoys. While I cook a bit more for a holiday, I don’t eat more than I normally would. We make the time spent cooking and eating memorable by reminding ourselves of what we love about each other and sharing great memories that we all have of being together. Then we reflect on the great memories of that day as we eat the leftovers. This one is a keeper. I actually realized that I enjoy this tradition more than I thought after taking the time to consider how I really feel about it.
- Buying gifts for friends and family for reasons other than a genuine, heart-felt desire. It occurred to me this year that I don’t really know my family members (outside of my husband and kids) well enough to buy them a truly heart-felt gift. In the past I’ve generally bought gifts because that’s what’s expected. The gifts have usually been gift cards because they’re easy, I don’t have to think much about it and the recipient can turn them into whatever they want. I’ve done my duty. I’ve chosen to not continue this one. I don’t want to be the giver or the recipient to this kind of gift. I don’t need more stuff in my life (I actually need to purge a bit more). I don’t want others to give me anything out of a sense of duty or guilt. I know that this decision won’t go over well with others who want to maintain the status quo but I’m acting in accordance with my own personal values.
My hope is that you are simply more mindful in the decisions you make throughout the year. Take the extra moment to consider whether your decisions are in alignment with your own personal goals and values. And, yes, having fun can definitely be one of those goals or values.
How has being more mindful about your choices affected those choices?
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Living intentionally means being present to the moment, living your values and ending up where you intended to be, living how you intended to live.
But there's no way to really do that unless you have thought about where you want to end up and how you want to live. It's the "how" part that we all seem to forget about.
In this list of 100 Things To Do Before You Die, you'll be challenged because you won't just be thinking about your adventures. You'll also be thinking about the ways you want to grow, learn and give. This gets you focused on the "how."
Go ahead and dive into this list, and if you want the full 100 Things, get them here at Wishing Well Coach, a blog for people who want to have more fun and do what they care about at work.
Find out how to easily (and happily) manage your weight with mindfulness using the Mindful Body Program.